Saturday, June 03, 2006
oh my gosh!! i feel so guilty eating pastamania today!! argh. how bout my diet. in e end when i reached home, vomited everything out, e creamy chick all came out. yeew~ i wanna hav a perfect body, cos fio is slim n pretty. i cnt lose to her. hate it. havin a bad headache at e moment.was so funny, we went bishan, as in mi, lyn n manda. then aft manda left, mi n lyn jus walked around. lol. so sian. then a guy came to ask for number. so weird. but i kinda wanna pierce my lip, cos tt guy had tt pierce'in. so cool. ha. but i normally pierce when i feel irritated or mayb fan ba. cos if i do, i'll b more occupied rather than sittin at hm doing nth.mum cried ytd, i dunno y, at first i thought tt she quarrelled w dad. but only tis aft nn when kor called to tell mi tt is was bout jiejie. haix. same old problem. i can understand y mummy thinks so. i'll do e same if my daughter is like jiejie. haix. mayb jie shd get married to some1 her standard n not sum1 worst off than her by millions.. blah. even thou i may say tis now. if i were jie, i'll also choose hu i love . omg. so COMPLICATED.hmm, sumthin incised my cardiac organ. freakin painful. izzit true tt if i love him, im supposed to let him go n find his happiness tt he wans? but if it really is e case, wont it b excruciating for mi? i m willing to do anything, jus for him to b happy, tt's if he really dn love mi. i'll keep on waitin, i believe in miracles.broadway is so cool, it's e finale item for rapture con tis year!! b sure to watch!!charissa has a bf! congrats. thou it been sum time already. =)
luvin Dar
Friday, June 02, 2006
lyn's butt
mi n lyn, look at my tummy, i hav a baby!! lol, jus kiddin, is jus a pack of superrings in my jacket.
VK's crazy
">WALKi look like such a retard.
i feel so sick. cnt blog. missin him like always. God, pls show mi e route i shd take.
luvin Dar
i know tt u hab already made it v clear tt u'll move on. everything is in e past. but i'll jus hope tt e next gal wil love u more than i do. then i hav nth else better to say, but only 2 leave. i cnt imagine wat will i become, if i were 2 c u w her. i'll die. i cnt force u or anything. i can only hope tt u'll nv forget mi n our memories. i may b stubborn, but im sry, i'll wait stil. years ltr, i'll stil b waitin. cos i rmb our childish promise - tt u'll marry mi. i noe we're stil young, but i had always believe tt we'll last forever. i'll agree to any condition(s) jus to hav u back. i love u.
tis may b jus a little pain tt im going thru, but i m sure tt im tt stubborn to stick on 2 wat i wan, so e pain wil always b there. hmm, dunno wat e hell i mean. anyways, she mas b damn happy cos she finally got wat she wanted all along. i truely hate her, but no matter how much i dislike her, everything is over. ma(his mum) said b4, tt i mus learn to take things easy. ya. bet tt night was e last time im gonna hear ma's voice. i love u dar, i love u.
i've learn to stop cryin, cos i dun wanna make u feel wat u felt tt time. i dun cry. not cos it doesn't matter to mi, but jus tt at least i still hav our memories to keep mi alive, tt's y i shd smile. i've spent ur 2 birthdays w u already, u missed mine last year, guess it's e same for tis year too.
i m smiling becos of u. =) e place in my heart can only b filled by my dar.
luvin Dar
look at e middle of the pic, then u'll c wat tt word is. thinkin of wat xinyi said. if there's no love, i shdn't b forcein e relationship. but i jus dun believe tt he dun love mi anymore. we had happy times b4. n there is sum stuffs tt's stil bothering mi. i need him badly. my head's burnin. i was sick n i needed him, i called, but then.. i cant take tis anymore. i jus wanna forget everything. it's impossible. e first day we met, u actually caught my eye. i was thinkin of how to start a conversation w u. but u were always tokin to jaime. i love u.if only i was invisible, i'll b able to b by ur side. i cnt get e sour feelin in my heart to disappear. ilu.
luvin Dar
Thursday, June 01, 2006
c tis pic?
it's mi n him.
??
u cnt find him??
there, he's right there.
in my heart.
im thinkin of u.
luvin Dar
jus saw tis in my phone, think lyn took it. lol. finally could put on my contacts, but still eyes quite red. hopefully it'll get better.
oh, this is my so-called breakfast-lunch-dinner for today. it WAS. until lyn drop e whole box on e floor. then i had nth to eat(she mus b sayin it again, 'stop rubbin it in~"). lol
my bag.
so gross rite? we went pizza hut. cos ended early, then i also got nowhere to go. tt's a mix of chilli bits, cheese, pepsi, cream, spagetti. yeew~ there goes my diet AGAIN!! at first i lost 2kg, then put on 1kg aft ytd's bbq. i think i'll go back to my actual weight!! argh. all tt "eat-cereals-only" diet is such a failure!! shit. omg, i drank PEPSI!!
rmb sum1 said tt when i hav no mood or when im totally lost. i'll jus listen to sum noisy stuffs which i normally dun like, cos ya, jus TOO noisy~ omg, i really did. unknowingly. but anyway. at least i hav the video i made for him on his birthday.
passed Madigan's while i was on my way hm today, n e song tt i was listening to at the moment was - nv b replaced by 1st ladi. i wanted so much to burn tt pub down.
tis was wat i made for his birthday.. watch e video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OUtRJZCNPAQ
luvin Dar
tis was taken ytd. w swollen eyes. at dance. lyn's holdin a PAO. mi holdin on to my breakfast-lunch-dinner. w/o contacts.
mi n mel at bishan, buyin food for e bbq. was like going to 8 le.
took a pic of mel n yun.. they say i cnt cook, so i wasn't helpin, it's not an excuse!! =)
mel sort of forced him to send mi hm, cos it was late. mel ar. tsk tsk. anyway, thanx for ur sweater. btw, i was wearin shorts, not skirt. -_-ll i love u guys, e bbq was quite fun. =)
luvin Dar
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
day 1 of a pulverized heart:
eyes swollen, got to wear specs to sch.. =( so UGLY!!
e memories, are keepin mi alive. i'll b waitin, like in e past.
ur my obsession.
luvin Dar
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
a call at 9.58 ended everything. it was 13 min 16 secs.
it's over.
cnt believe.
i feel like im being strangled.
i need oxygen.
im gonna die.
i luv u, not jus in the past or now, but forever.
luvin Dar
pics taken on his bday. luv u more than anything in my life. pls stop doing tis to mi. u said tt u'll nv let her hurt mi ever again. i believed all ur words. im bleedin, inside n out. jus wish tt i nv did saw wat she wrote to u. wished tt i was still kept in e dark. wished tt we nv met. im hangin on, cos i stil love u like ever b4.
luvin Dar
Monday, May 29, 2006
FCUK TT DAMN BITCH!! U WAN HIM SO BADLY, Y NOT TRY STRIPPIN INFRONT OF HIM, GREAT POSSIBILITY TT IT MIGHT WORK!! *it's not as if u've nv done it b4*
she was e one hu first said fuckin nonsense. now the whole world thinks tt ur the angel n im the devil. even him too. so wat r u tryin to achieve? him? FUCK HIM ALL U WAN. guys cant resist temptations. SLUT. can predict wat u'll say:"dar, i feel so hurt, i cant stand it. sob*"
FUCK U LO, all i said was true. r u even a VIRGIN? i dun think so.
but 1 thing is also true. he cares for her. izzit true tt i shd really end tis. i din wan to, cos i thought he loved mi. but now, things r gettin clearer bout hu he cares for.. but, if i leave, she'll accomplish her motive. ma, i wld really wanna b ur "si fu"(tt time u said so), but it's time for mi to face reality. i mus move out of my fantasy. it was n always will, only b a delusion. if she wans him n she gets him, it also cos he is willing to go to her. rmb the dvd we watch ytd? person A hav a gf, miss B, hu is also miss C's good fren. but then when person A quarrelled w miss B, he went to look for miss C.. n he sort of like miss C. then in the end miss B found out, but was willing to stil stay w person A. but person A told her to find sum other better guy, so miss B went overseas. it takes 2 hands to clap, so cliché, ha.i think i hav split personality.i look scary when i get angry? actually no, cos im always smiling. tt's y my strength is my mask. so.. haha, no mood to write stuffs, so wrote tis stupid haha.
luvin Dar
argh, artem got out. 3 couples left. i was thinkin tt sum1 can do his turns better n more then any1 of them. he is jus so pro, they shd hav a so u think u can dance thingy in sg too. it's b nice. i mis him. he said tt he'll mis call mi when he finishes his dinner. but it's alreay 9++ when he started eatin 2 hrs b4.. hubb..tmr's dance is 11.30 to 6.. haix. back hurts. T_T then it's 9 to 5 again for wednesday.. loloh ya, saw wanhua on tbee ytd. best of luck!!yawn.
luvin Dar
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wrote it 99 times, cant copy n paste de. typed it out 1 by 1. it's a v impt date!!i heart my BF.
luvin Dar
jus came home. there goes my diet plan. ate mac's, gave in to TEMPTATIONS!! argh. hmm, jus tired. wanted so much to go visit my hubb. mis him like hell. he bit mi ytd -_-ll
i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArREn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI AN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArREn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiANg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIanG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!! i loVe dArReN LiAnG KaI An!! i lOvE DaRrEn lIaNg kAi aN!! I LoVe DaRrEn LiaNg KaI aN!!
i heart him lots lots. muacks hubb, ganna mis manda cos she'll b at pre-u sem for 1 week. kisses!! hate studyin T_T
luvin Dar
Saturday, May 27, 2006
i cant take it anymore. im worried tt i'll give up 1 day.i need security.i feel e sourness in my heart.im NOT ur pet.im jus going mad.i wan to e cindy i used to b.if i change, m i still cindy??or m i jus a pet.which listens to ur orders?
luvin Dar
shouted at lyn.
im sry.
i was thinkin bout wat happened ytd.
i was so pissed.
btw, it was dar's bday ytd. came hm bout 3 morn. drank, zhenhong n a gal were drunk. lol, i stil ok. dar leh, also blur blur de. couldn't walk properly.. heard andy they all going MOS party on 30 de. haix. now i noe y kids these day r rotten like hell. had to reach sch by 8.30 for ipho. OMG. haix. din eat breakfast.
a little sumthin for my beloved hubb:
click on
THIScried during dance.
i think there r no tears left,
think they had resigned frm their jobs.
went to meet him jus now.
haix.
went hm myself.
again.
it was so dark.
n scary.
i cried while runnin hm.
cos the forest was damn eerie.
i called him.
he din cal mi back.
i was alone.
in the dark.
cryin.
tired aft all the tedious "training" 4 dance, quarrels w him.
i need sumthin to cheer mi up.
btw, lyn i was so touched tt u said u'll watch da vinci w mi, thou u manda asked u to go w them today. i cant go today, so sry. i even abd u for dinner. sry. i really feel so guilty. luv u lyn.
hubb i love u.
luvin Dar
mi n lyn, look at my tummy, i hav a baby!! lol, jus kiddin, is jus a pack of superrings in my jacket.
jus saw tis in my phone, think lyn took it. lol. finally could put on my contacts, but still eyes quite red. hopefully it'll get better.
oh, this is my so-called breakfast-lunch-dinner for today. it WAS. until lyn drop e whole box on e floor. then i had nth to eat(she mus b sayin it again, 'stop rubbin it in~"). lol
mi n mel at bishan, buyin food for e bbq. was like going to 8 le.
took a pic of mel n yun.. they say i cnt cook, so i wasn't helpin, it's not an excuse!! =)
mel sort of forced him to send mi hm, cos it was late. mel ar. tsk tsk. anyway, thanx for ur sweater. btw, i was wearin shorts, not skirt. -_-ll i love u guys, e bbq was quite fun. =)
day 1 of a pulverized heart:
